Blogging, you're doing it wrong!

The Internet is filled with helpful posts with titles like "How to blog", "28 tips for running a successful blog", "If you don't follow my rules your blog will die in the fiery pits of hell and your lap top will spontaneously combust in disgust at your woeful blogging, which is an abomination in the eyes of God", or something similar.

When I first began blogging I would read these posts and cringe at my lack of blogging skills. I was doing 90% of the things in these lists wrong, or was totally unaware that certain rules existed. I would stew over them, wondering how to best apply them to my fledgling words. My Type A personality was determined to get this blogging malarky right.

And now?

Almost six years after I first pushed publish I realised I wasn't following any of the stock standard rules and I'd stopped reading those posts.

You see blogging with and about chronic illness doesn't always fit into the rules. Talking to fellow chronically ill bloggers it became clear that for many of us the rules don't work, particularly if your symptoms are unpredictable or quite severe. We are constrained by things like fatigue, pain, brain fog and that pesky problem of trying not to puke up on your keyboard (it's a pain in the arse to try and get half digested chunks out from between the keys). Our blogs are also inherently personal and therefore incredibly unique.

For many of us it is not a question of not wanting to write or not having anything to write about. Instead it is the physical constraints of our bodies that hamper our efforts. And let me tell you, there is nothing more frustrating than being foiled by the chronic illness about which you are trying to raise awareness.I even made it to a blogging conference this year, only to miss half of it as I was busy concentrating on not passing out or vomiting on my note pad.

For me writing about Dysautonomia and my various other dodgy body parts is not about providing a medical resource. I don't offer medical advice or doctor recommendations. I offer no services and have no skills to teach. I didn't set out to raise awareness, although that has developed organically.

All I have to offer my readers is my story.

99% of the posts on my blog are simply snippets about my life with chronic illness. Nothing more and nothing less. Every now and then I get a bit mouthy about certain issues pertaining to disability or chronic illness. But mostly it's just me rabbiting on about the things I experience and the thoughts that rattle around in my head. If a lesson is learnt or a process explained it is more luck than planning.

I understand that for many the rules work. Just not for me. And accepting that I just want to write, rather concentrate on branding, or strategies, has kept blogging a pleasure rather than a chore.

I can also accept that I am going to fail at many of the blogging basics.

I don't plan my posts and I have no schedule.

I learnt long ago that scheduling when living with an unpredictable chronic illness, is a lesson in frustration. It simply set me up for failure. Instead I post when it feels right. That could be once a week or three times a week. Being a personal blog that works. Forcing a post shows. If I'm scratching my head for a topic to write about, I know it's time to step away from the keyboard. I tried back in the beginning to create a schedule and stick to it. This ended up with me spending hours staring at the keyboard waiting for inspiration. In the meantime you could hear crickets in my dull and empty head and I was using up my limited energy reserves on a useless endeavour. I can plan to post every Tuesday at 11am. Problem is that at 10am on Tuesday I may be bent over the loo praying for death, or passed out on the tiles surrounded by an accumulation of dust bunnies and short and curlies, courtesy of my lack luster house keeping. Scheduling is not my friend.

I am a grammar and spelling loser. 

Once upon a time I was known for my writing skills. Lecturers and co-workers would always remark on my literary prowess. Now I am reduced to working with one brain cell named Eunice, and poor old Eunice is overworked. My token response to questions of grammar and spelling are to do a quick check on all the words that have a squiggly red line underneath, and trying not end a sentence with a preposition. My initial drafts are 90% red as I have problems coordinating my fingers and I tend to substitute words even though my brain tells me that I am typing the right word. Add in fatigue and a decided lack of O2 to the lack lustre grey blob that resides in my skull and my final post is often a grammatical abomination. And I'm okay with that. It is often only when the humourless bastions of grammatical purity point out my mistakes that I even notice they exist. However, short of a mistake such as forgetting a vitally important letter in 'count' (been there, done that), I don't tend to go back and re-edit a published post. My writing will never be perfect, and I kinda like that. I simply don't have the cognitive skills required any more and I'm not going to head out back for some self-flagellation because someone pointed out that I put a comma where I should have put a semicolon.

I swear.

Not a lot, but I do. The first post I wrote had the F word three times in the first sentence. My last post ended with calling certain people "an arsehole". If you don't like it, don't read it. But I'm not going to sanitise my experience. Sometimes a good swear is what you need. Sometimes a choice, well-placed expletive gives the emphasis needed. Being chronically ill is frustrating. Dealing with ignorance is frustrating. Dealing with the medical system is frustrating. And the vast majority of my readers understand and relate to that frustration. I have no intention of censoring my writing so in all likelihood my future work will be peppered with expletives if it is appropriate to my topic.

I am big on TMI.

My bowels have featured heavily on this blog because their dysfunction has been a large part of the last 8 years. My dysfunctional bowels have landed me in hospital, I have been scoped more times than I can count and had the indignity of being given an enema by an overly chatty nurse. I share my experiences, because it demystifies and normalises them for others in the same position. Illness is scary because it is unknown. Every time I talk about poo I am inundated with emails thanking me for discussing such a sensitive topic. Fear lives because shame keeps us from sharing. So poo and various poo-related jokes will continue to be part of this blog.

I'm not big on the phenomenon of Illness Inspiration.

Everywhere you turn it's all rainbow-farting unicorns and sparkle covered epiphanies. Roll models for perfect patients abound. They are trotted out regularly on day time TV with big hair and Julia Robert's type smiles so that the hosts and viewing public can bask in their inspirational goodness. That's not reality and leaves the rest us patients feeling like we are doing illness wrong. Well pfft to that! I write about the crap times as much as the good times. I have a laugh where I can and am a big fan of glitter, but I am not here to offer up epiphanies and inspiration on a daily basis. Sometimes I am a whingy, whiney, and sour individual and I'll write about that just as much as I'll write about the times I am happy. Perky has never been part of my make up. Sarcasm on the otherhand is my go-to response to most aspect of life.

I don't have clue about SEO or HTML.

I have Google Analytics but tend to only look at the words people used to find my blog ("Don Johnson smells cat wee" is still my favourite) and where people come from (Hi regular reader from Uzbekistan). My technical knowledge is non-existent. I have more chance of solving the Reimann's Hypothesis than working out how to create a blog button. Learning is hard when Eunice is just trying to keep me upright and breathing. I keep thinking I should move my blog and make it look more professional, but the idea of trying to do it myself and a complete lack of funds (if only dust bunnies could be used as currency) means apathy wins out. Plus every time someone looks down on Blogger it makes me dig my heels in further. I can pay out on my blog platform and complain about it's faults, but if you start bad mouthing my platform I'll take you out at the knees.

I am shite at self-promotion.

Networking is exhausting and I always feel like the odd blogger out. I don't feel comfortable about entering blogging competitions and cringe at asking for votes. I never feel confident enough to share my posts widely. (I may need some therapy to get over that) But above all I don't have the energy. By the time I've published a post I am ready for a nanna nap. The idea of sharing and promoting it is pushed aside by the simple need to breathe and wipe the drool from my droopy mouth. It goes in the too hard basket. Self-promotion or pain meds and coma sleep to recover from the writing induced migraine? The latter always wins. I also have the organisational skills of a meth-addled lemur. I did get all proactive at one point and write myself a list of sites where I could share my posts. And then I promptly lost the list because I have a memory like a sieve. I regularly forget to take my meds, which live in a dosette box next to my bed, and are situated where they are the very first thing I see in the morning. So trying to organise promotion for my blog or particular posts is a pipe dream.

Blog statistics bore me senseless.

I know I should know them. I know they are important. But I just can't work up any interest in them. After 7yrs of statistics and research methods when I was doing my undergraduate and post-graduate degrees, I am statisticed out. Watch Judge Judy or check out my page views? Hmmm I would rather watch old Judes rip the dodgy check-cashing, half-wits a new one. Or I could do another Portlandia marathon, or re-watch Season 1 of The Walking Dead, yet again. Or nap. I don't have an Elevator Pitch and have no idea what my Brand is. The fact that people on the other side of the world there are people who call their version of Dysautonomia, Bob is far more exciting and satisfying than my Bounce Rate or Page Views. And everytime I recieve an email to say that I made a difference in someones life, it gives meaning and value to every hard fought word.

My body will continue to get in the way of blogging. I will post about the wrong things, in the wrong style, at the wrong time, and be completely incompetent on all technical aspects of blogging.

So I'm giving myself a break.

Blogging, I'm doing it all wrong. And I'm loving it.

Michelle :)

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Favourite Blogs: Day 14 #NHBPM

Oh dear lord it's late here in Australia. Way past my bedtime and definitely past my brain time. I'm taking one of the alternative topics for Day 14. This time

My Favourite Blogs.

I do read a lot of other chronic illness and health blogs. Some I have read for many years now. Blogging friends from around the world who's stories and lives I love to catch up on.

But when I think of the blogs that are my go to read on on a Sunday morning or when I am stuck in bed, most have nothing to do with illness. Times like that I need to escape my world and embrace beautiful things and humour.

Vintage Fashion. 

Chronically Vintage: Lovely Canadian blogger Jessica is a fellow patient, but more importantly she has as amazing vintage blog which I adore. Between her fantastic outfits and her lovely writing, her blog is always a pleasure. Loving her vintage recipes. Although the ingredients are slightly different thanks to the whole international difference, they always remind me of the way my grandmother used to cook and a Country Women's Association cookbook I have with dishes from the 40's. Check out this amazing post she did on wearing vintage clothing when chronically ill or you have special needs. Just brilliant. I think that was the first post that sent me her way (via a recommendation from Brittany at Va Voom Vintage: see below) and I've been reading ever since.

Esme and the Laneway: I've been reading local Australian blogger Marianne's blog for a long time now. Her blog is filled with beautiful pictures and it really is a visual feast. Her combination of vintage fashion with modern pieces like her wedge heels are always perfect and she, like her blog, always look gorgeous. I was lucky enough to win a prize on her blog earlier this year and took a stab at doing my own fashion post and she was kind enough not to laugh, so she'll always be a favourite.

Super Kawaii Mama: I was lucky enough to meet Candice De Ville this year when Mr Grumpy and the boys brought me a ticket to her class at a local vintage show. Candice is another Melbourne girl and I have followed her blog for a few years now. She has an amazing vintage style and her knowledge about the genre is phenomenal. Her course was fantastic and if you ever have a chance to go to one I'd definitely recommend it. I was just a tad excited to meet her and even more excited that I managed to get a vintage fan girl picture with her.

Va Voom Vintage: Brittany is an American blogger. Her blog is a fantastic educational tool as well as vintage treasure. If you want to know about how to tell true Bakelite (and I do as I love Bakelite jewellery) from reproduction or how to care for you vintage garments, she's your girl. I really love that once a week she dedicates a post to a style icon (this week Grace Kelley).

Fashion: 

Lady Melbourne: I've followed Phoebe's blog for years. Pretty much since I ever started reading blogs. Phoebe has a background in fashion and journalism and has become a style icon here in Australia. What first attracted me to her blog was her insight into local Melbourne fashion introducing me to a host of previously unknown designers. She's also a really lovely person as I discovered when I was lucky to win a shopping spree with her last year. I love her style, where she flows from vintage op shop pieces to designer wears, to create a style that is uniquely hers.

Cecylia.com: lovely local Melbournian Cecylia is vet by day fashionista by, well day and night. Like Phoebe above her style is her own and it's fabulous. Again she mixes a range of pieces that I would never have thought to put together and makes it work. Cecylia like all the other fashion bloggers I have mentioned is lovely, and I think that comes through in all the blogs and probably why she and the others are on my favourites list.

Design Inspiration.

Poppy Talk: I have no idea how to really categorise this Canadian blog. All I know is that I love all the images and styles they show. It has been a source of great inspiration for how I want to style my home and future craft projects. Well worth a look.

Photography.

Dakota D: I stumbled across Dakota's photography blog last year and have been reading ever since. It is filled with beautiful photos from around the world, from his time in Europe and back to his native New Zealand. It is simply beautiful and a real delight to read through.

Humour with added extras.

BugginWord: I have read Elly's blog for years now. She is lovely, she is funny, she likes show tunes, ukeleles and glittery unicorns. She is often irreverent and NSFW but she is also touching and lovely. She also sang me a ukelele song (below) when I was sick in hospital and sent me Kenneth Kazoo all the way from the US so I'll always love her. She's one of the few people I can honestly say I would love to sit and have a coffee (or a wine or three) with some time, you know if I'm ever in Jersey or she happens to be in The Land Down Under.

Pajamas and Coffee: I've been reading Mary since way back when. It's always strange to find someone on the other side of the world with a sense of humour similar to your own. Self-deprecating, oversharing (you should read about the run in between her lady bits and a jelly fish) and irreverant I kinda like that.

Alfred Lives Here: Brahm is officially my favourite Canadian, dog loving, gay blogger. Whether it's pop culture, gay rights or pictures of Alfie the super cute canine you can't go past Alfred Lives Here. Again I've been reading Brahm's blog for years (I think I may have found him through Pajamas and Coffee from memory). Plus he's a great guy who understands my own love of my four footed family members.

So there you go a few of my favourite blogs. In all cases it is not just the blogs but their owners that make them special. They are a great bunch of people.

Cheers
Michelle :)

New Year Thankfulness: Friends From The Ether.

I've never been big on the whole idea of New Year Resolutions, or New Year celebrations for that matter.  Why wait for one day in the year to set about making changes in your life?  Are the other 364 days in the year somehow resolution-challenged?  Why go to the effort to make resolutions that you know you simply wont keep?  Resolutions are about small egocentric goals.  "I will lose 10 kg", "I will join a gym", "I will give up smoking".  Move forward two weeks and you've gained another 2kg, you've already skipped your last three gym sessions and you've decided having only one cigarette with a coffee is enough of a step this year.  What is the point?

Where are the "I will endeavour to make the world a better place for all, one small step at a time" goals?  They seem non-existent these days.  Maybe it's just that I'm getting old and jaded.  Maybe it's my severe case of bah humbug that prevailed over most of December this past year.  Maybe I just need to find my elusive happy place. I think it's a little like Narnia.  Except my wardrobe is shaped a little more like this.

If I am to make a resolution this year (and I can feel every fibre in my body rebelling as I type) it is to make a conscious effort to be thankful. 

Give me an hour of your time and I can list off the load of shiteness that has come my way over the last few years, until you too will wish to weep into your Corn Flakes.

Oh how hath thee crapped on me oh universe, let me count the ways. 

That's easy.  Finding reasons to be thankful is not.

So today I am starting by saying thank you to all those people who have come into my life over the past four years via this computer screen, most of whom I have never met in the flesh (and could in fact be a greasy middle-aged guy who lives in his mother's basement, collects action figures and can recite the entire works of Shakespeare in Klingon, or Vulcan, depending on his mood) yet make my little world a better place.

Friends from the Lands of Blog.

Blogging has been an unexpected pleasure.  Before I became a blogger myself I thought people who talked about their "internet friends" were sad little people who needed to get a life.  Now I realise how wrong I was.  Friendship comes in many forms and blogging can provide an honesty and openness that you would never find in the real world.  It truly is a community.  You can put yourself out there, warts and all, and find that you are not a complete freak (well, I guess that depends on your definition of 'freak'.  I'm sure there are many who have read my blog who are convinced that I am a complete freak.  But that's okay, and I'm pretty happy to embrace my freakdom at this point).  The world can seem like a lonely place at times, whether you are ill or not.  Blogging is like a life line that wipes away that loneliness and connects you with a whole world full of people and possibilities.

I am always surprised by who reads my ravings.  I can be a little out there at times.  I tell inappropriate and frequently unfunny jokes.  I am yet to have an epiphany or see the light.  My grammar and spelling are consistently appaulling.  Whilst I truly appreciate the love, I have to wonder, why are you reading people?

I can understand why someone else who has Bob, or another illness, may read what I write simply to be reminded that we all go through the same emotions, symptoms, or issues.  Being ill is a lonely business, and often a scary one.  Those who aren't ill can provide much appreciated support, but there is a certain level of understanding that can only be found with someone who is, or has been, in a similar position.  When you are silly enough to pick an obscure disorder, it is even more fantastic to find others who are in the same boat.  Though I do wish we could have picked the boat that sails around the Caribbean, rather the one that floats in the porcelain drain.

But there are also a large number of people who read my blog who don't have Bob or anything even remotely similar.  People whose lives are completely removed from my own small sphere of existence.  People who are truly lovely and provide support or laughs as needed.  People whose own blogs fill me with delight and much needed distraction.  People whose writing fills me with awe, or have me snorting my coffee onto my keyboard.  People who take the time to connect.  People who are genuinely interested. 

There are a small group of bloggers that I would truly class as friends.  Who make me laugh, and cry. Who give support in the good and bad times.  Who simply seem to get it.  That fall into that category of people I'd love to have a margarita with one day, or coffee, or margarita and coffee, really I'm not that picky.  They are not necessarily people you talk to every day or every week, but when you do it's as if you only saw them yesterday and have known them a lifetime.  There are many others that I would love to get to know better.  Most are from completely different backgrounds and countries to myself, but somehow something clicks.  Somehow you make a connection.  There are people out there who are truly lovely.  People who I would never have met if it weren't for the blogosphere, and for that I am thankful.

Friends from the Book of Faces.

When you have a weirdo disorder it's damn hard to find anyone else who has it.  When I was first diagnosed I hadn't even heard of Bob.  Here in Australia there was no support or information.  Then along came Facebook.  I was convinced by a friend (who is no longer in the picture) to get onto FB.  I thought she was nuts, but decided to take the plunge.  Now I can't imagine not being on. FB gets a bad rap at times, much of it deserved.  But when you are bed or couch bound, it can become your link to the outside world.  It has allowed me to meet people from all over the world who have the joy of Bob in their lives.  It has provided resources and a sharing of information that I otherwise would never have found.

When I read through my list of FB friends and their information, on the surface it would seem we would have little in common except for being ill.  We are all from different countries, different religious backgrounds, different careers, family situations etc.  Many who like Twilight (that's just for you Cyndi) or even (shudder) Justin Beiber.  Yet there is an underlying similarity that transcends the differences.  A view of the world and an ability to laugh in the face of unrelenting crap that is more of a bond than any of the other stuff.  A group of people for who there is no sense of TMI.  Where you can comfortably discuss the less glamorous side of illness that would make other people blush, or gag, as the case may be.  Where you can make totally inappropriate jokes about your health  that would have others wondering whether it was time to call the men in white coats, and it's okay.  Some of these wonderful people I have known from the start, some are newer friends, but all make this journey a little bit more bearable and I am thankful that I have found them.

When your body is out of commission and your mind is about all you have left (insert joke about my diminishing brain capacity), the internet provides an outlet and a way of interacting in the world that would otherwise be denied us.  I for one, am grateful for the friendships I have made and the laughs and support I have been given.

Big Love People.  Big Love.

(Next week I get to meet some fellow Bobettes here in fair old Melbourne as we head out for lunch.   Very excited to finally meet face to face).  

Cheers
The Very Thankful Michelle :)

Groove Armada,My Friend (2001)

Apologies From an Errant Blogger

OK so it's been a few weeks. I'm a bad blogger I know. I will take myself out back for a bit of self-flagellation later on to atone for my poor posting efforts. But hey I'm going to pull the sick card, it's got to be good for something. So suck it up people. In my oxygen deprived state I was delusional and overly optimistic about the whole health thing. Now I have been firmly sat on my arse by reality and after a lovely little stay in rehab (aka my bed) I am able to at least attempt some coherent blogging, although there are no guarantees and what follows may be little more than line after line of dross filled waffle.

No talking about crappy health this week. No stories of migraines that threatened to liquefy my eyeballs, clumsiness that made me drop multiple vegetables onto my none too clean kitchen floor on Christmas day (30 second rule firmly in place so all OK), or nanna naps on my bathroom tiles where I was too fatigued and dizzy to remove myself from the way-too-close vicinity of a lone and shifty-looking, short, black and curly hair that I swear was slowly moving towards my face a millimetre at a time each time I closed my eyes. No! No more. Not today. Never again. Well...maybe next week.

The last few weeks I have lived vicariously through the Internet. Whilst my own output has been limited there are millions of champion bloggers out there who have been reducing their finger tips to bloody stumps in their furious attempts to keep us in their fascinating loops. I am amazed at the work ethic of some bloggers. The ones that post every day or at least a couple of times a week. I'm not talking about the ones that are just a perpetual list of crap twitter tweets disguised as blogs.

"Cleaning the fridge" Picture of said fridge pasted underneath. posted Dec 3 9:30pm,
"Off to scoop up dog poo from back yard" posted Dec 4 11:34am, ad infinitum, does not a blog make!

I am however impressed by the diversity of blogs out there. No matter what your fancy there's a blog out there for you. Check out one of those "What you Should Read" lists for an eye opener. 10 minutes scanning the list and I found everything from a blog devoted to the humble hedgehog (why?); a fellow who was happy to tell me the multitude of reasons I would burn in hell for all eternity thanks to my Godless and heathen ways (a real peppy people person); and the daily musings of a dominatrix. I had never realised the difficulties a dominatrix faced on a day-to-day basis. How do you explain a box filled with various leather apparatuses to the police at a road block? Well she can give you all manner of tips for dealing with just such a a situation. Who knows when you might just need that information?

What I do love are the blogs that demonstrate a level of conscious thought and creativity. These give me hope that there are people out there in the world who don't think Neighbours is comparable to Tolstoy, or that Lady Gaga's sagacious words "I'd like to take a ride on your disco stick" outmatch anything written by The Bard. People who remember that there was a time before "LOL smiley face heart". A mystical world where we were allowed to use whole words to express our emotions. (Okay so I occasionally resort to using these communicative abominations but I am like brain impaired, like, OK, umm, LOL).

I follow a range of different blogs which sort of represent the various little worlds (or the voices in my head) of Michelle . Health, Humour, Food, Music, Literature, whatever takes my fancy on the day. Of late I have made a deliberate move out of the health sphere to grab a little bit of the real world. Too many health blogs can make you rather depressed after a while. As anyone who has worked in mental health for any length of time knows, it gets to a point where it takes a lot to shock you, so not all of them are PG 13, but most are guaranteed to make you laugh. A case in point is a recent post by Calling People Names where she describes a shaving mishap with her "bizness" that is both graphic and hilarious. I know there are many out there who would find her topics far too graphic and what my mum would call "naughty", but her skills as a writer far outweigh any shock from her topic choices and I never fail to laugh at the descriptions of a life that is so far removed from my own. For me I like good writing regardless of the topic. Unfortunately you have to search high and low for that these days. Occasionally you get lucky and come across a couple that make you want to actually follow publicly rather than lurk on the fringe so no one finds out your dirty little secret. There are three that I've really enjoyed over the past few months (not that there aren't others I enjoy equally I just didn't feel like doing 15 blog reviews, so nothing personal to those I don't mention and if I can pull my finger out I may write about you another day). I love all three of these blogs for very different reasons and for one very similar huge flashing neon light fact; fantastic, original and creative writing. All three of these blogs make me wish that I could force my flagging brain to reliably create whole sentences, to actually verbalise what I feel and think with some semblance of intelligence. That I could remember all those tedious grammar lessons from my Grade 3/4 teacher, the post-menopausally hirsute Mrs Redfern, who could flagellate your soul at 50 paces with her spiteful tongue, or through the use of a metre long wooden ruler across the knuckles depending on her hormonal load. Basically they make me want to be a better writer.

I don't know exactly how to describe these blogs in any way that does them justice so I'll just say:

Mr London Street: you've gotta admire a guy that can write about Doogie Howser MD, Moomintroll and the joys and pitfalls of amateur wedding photography to make you laugh or think or simply feel. A truly talented writer that makes me want to journey over the pond to experience the Reading he describes so eloquently. (Recently a Blog of Note on the Blogger site, but I like to say I knew him way back when, before the fame and the glory).
My Soul is a Butterfly: In one word, Beautiful. Hannah is more artist than writer. The topic is secondary to words that simply sing. It's the type of writing you can lose yourself in.
The Imaginary Reviewer: I don't know whether it's the brilliantly dry humour of his reviews of imaginary TV shows, magazines, books etc, or the fact that there are so many bright sparks in the world who write asking what channel the shows are on or where they can buy the book, but it cracks me up.

I realised the other day I'd regressed to teenage groupie status. I went to write a comment on one of the above mentioned blogs, stopped, and thoughts racing began to panic. Will they like my comment? Will they think I am a complete loser? Is my comment witty or pathetic and sad? Write delete, write delete. I think the answer is sad loser geek, but what can you do? So there you go these three writers are up there with my 13-year-old pre-pubescent adoration of Wham (oh how I loved George Michael. I spent many a night dreaming of snogging him backstage at one of the concerts. Obviously my finely tuned Gaydar was still in the development stage at that point along with my boobs. Funny how the Gaydar developed but I'm still waiting on the boobs).

So there you go. A few blogs that would help anyone pass the time more pleasurably than my verbal detritus. I do however, apologise for my lack of blogging. Although I do think you should thank me for not boring you senseless with lengthy and incoherent mutterings of "woe is me", which would have been 10 minutes of your life you could never get back. So really my lack of blogging was truly a public service.

Apologies
The Errant Blogger aka Michelle :)