Saturday 4 February 2012

Ink on a page

Taking part in Edenland's meme Fresh Horses Brigade today.

Writing by hand is a feat of epic proportions these days.  To hold the pen. To form the letters. To string together the sentence. To push through the shaking and the weakness. But there is something magical about putting ink on paper. Somehow more permanent and tangible than anything typed on a keyboard. Something that makes the building ache in my arm all worthwhile.

These are the words from my first attempt at a Dysautonomia awareness video.

Writing them out again reminds me once more that I am NOT my illness. Each letter, each word, proof that I am much, much, more.

Writing them again allows me to extend my middle finger to Bob (Dysautonomia). I may be shaking. I may be tachycardic, but I wrote it all out. 

Kiss my pasty 38-yr-old arse, Bob.


  1. Michelle, even though I've never read your blog before, I can tell you're determined to be better than Bob. And you know what? You ARE better than Bob. Bob sucks. You are a fighter.
    I can see it in your handwriting :)

  2. what an inspiration - thank you for joining in with Eden so I could find your blog xx

  3. I've only just got here via Eden's link up and goodness, you are amazing! I am so inspired by your story and by your attitude! I love your handwriting - it is awesome!

  4. Having Dysautonomia, I also find writing by hand very therapeutic. Much more so than using a keyboard. At my lowest points, imaganing the Dorothy shoe's and doodling or writng with pen help. Hope your weekend is peaceful.

  5. "Kiss my pasty 38-yr-old arse, Bob."--- LOVE IT! Well said, my bloggy friend!

    I find writing therapeutic for every kind of stress or pain, usually for myself then erase it or burn it. But then gotta clean up the damn mess if is paper I burned...

  6. You just completely blew me away. Just in one click ... your red shoes in the header, your writing, your handwriting. YOU ARE AMAZING.

    Thank you so so much for being part of this. I love seeing comments of people discovering other peoples blogs for the first time, too.

    Love, love to you.

    F*ck Bob.

    XXXXXX eden

  7. You are incredible and so brave. And I honestly thought at first that you had an insane crush on Bob Dylan, and so wish for you that was the case!

  8. I read a great essay years ago for my Theories of Writing class. It was all about the connection between your mind, eyes and hand when you write.

    I've been having issues handwriting too. Not thoracic outlet syndrome weakness issues, but Dandy Walker/hydrocephalus motor skill issues. Bleh. I haven't done it in years, but I'm going to using a Dr. Grip pen. Not sure if you can buy them in Australia, but I'm sure you can online. They really help writing fatigue and motor skill issues. Do you use some sort of pen grip?


All who are lovely enough to comment should be showered with cup cakes, glitter and macarons. I promise to use my spoon bending mind powers to try and get that happening for all who are lovely enough to share their words. Those who go the extra step to share posts should really get a free unicorn. Or at least the gift of finding the shortest and quickest line at the supermarket on a regular basis. xx

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