Friday 11 June 2010

Fabulous Friday: Glitter Dreams & Dorothy Shoes

What would a Fabulous Friday be without some glitz and glam?  I refuse to believe that just because I'm over 30, that I am somehow beyond my sparkly years.  If I want to break out the glitter and make myself some killer, sparkly, red heels I'm going to do it.

You better brace yourself because today I am going to get all crafty on your arse.

A few weeks back the lovely, and all-around Australian fashion goddess, Phoebe Montague from Lady Melbourne made her very own pair of Dorothy heels, following some muse-like inspiration courtesy of an Alison Goldfrapp album.  I developed a very unhealthy need to possess those shoes at the first glance.  I mean they are red and they are glittery, what more could any girl want.

I have taken Lady M's basic idea and added a few steps to ensure maximum adhesion and minimal dispersal of glitter.  Whilst it's cute to leave a trail of your own pixie dust in the form of glitter, I imagine there are many shop and restaurant owners who would be less than impressed with a trail of red glitter throughout their establishments.  Besides, no one wants a pair of heels that look like they have developed the mange.  And really a pair of heels missing large chunks of glitter is just sad.

Now there is no huge trick to these shoes of fabulosity.  Even I could manage it, and considering Eunice has been on long service leave, that means they are uber easy to make. They are a 3-day project, thanks to drying times.

Preparation is everything.  So here are the basic preparation steps.

  • Buy or recycle a pair of battered, and or super cheap heels (though I can't see why you couldn't do some ballet flats or go all outside the box, and bedazzle your ugg boots).  I got my heels of tackiness, from the sale rack at Target.  Mr Grumpy always says that a sale sign is really a "come in Michelle sign" and frankly, he's right (but don't tell him I said that.  Can't go around letting your man know he is right about such things).  I did a little dance of joy at my $10 price tag.  I would have used an old pair of my own heels, but I love them all too much, and it would have been like bedazzling one of my children.

  • Grab a bottle of PVA glue.  PVA is cheap as chips, and you can get it anywhere.  Luckily I have about 8 bottles at home in various cupboards.  It's one of those items that I see on a shelf in a store and think "that'll come in handy", so buy yet another bottle.  It's a sickness really.
  • Grab some red glitter.  You could go any colour glitter really.  Hell, you could go all unicorn farty and get rainbow coloured glitter (What you didn't know unicorns farted rainbows? Sheesh keep up people). Though why you would want a pair of shoes that looked like a unicorn had farted on them I don't know.  But I won't judge.  Now, where was I.  Oh yes glitter?  You don't need much, so don't be like me and buy the biggest jar of red glitter they had, and end up using about a bees dick worth.  One of those little tubes could just about do it.
  • Grab a piece of sandpaper.  Any old sandpaper will do.  I only used a small piece that I had lying around.  A mid-level grade of sandpaper does the trick.
  • A spray can of high gloss enamel.  Again you can purchase a can for minimal dollars, but I shelled out a few more dollars and brought some of the better stuff to avoid yellowing.  Because let's face it, no one wants a pair of heels that look like someone has peed on them.
  • Old paint brush.  Luckily I delude myself into thinking I'm an artist so I have a few old brushes hanging around.  One that's about 1cm across works well.
  • Old Newspaper.  This is one messy project.  Glitter is worse than sand and ends up everywhere, and I do mean everywhere.
  • 2 old plastic shopping bags
  • Wine.  Now I'm a sauvignon blanc or pinot gris girl, but you can pick whatever you like.  I think this is almost compulsory given that you are making sparkly party shoes, but if you have to abstain you can always just bust out the non-alcoholic cider or a nice juice and add a cocktail umbrella.
  • Music.  Again these are party shoes.  To impart the magic into them you need to play music.  For me, I did disco tunes, Donna Summer, Bee Gees and the like.  I did also put my Goldfrapp album on the playlist in homage to Lady M.
Now to get crafting.

Day 1:
  • Take a sip of wine and press play on your stereo.
  • Give the heels a light sand.  Rubbing all over the surface creates a better surface for the glue/glitter to adhere to.  Wipe them down with a damp cloth to remove all traces of dust.
  • Take another gulp sip of wine.
  • Paint on a decent layer of glue.  Using the paintbrush you can get into little joins and be more precise in your glittering areas.
  • Shake glitter all over the glued surface.  Shake off the excess. Luckily PVC is bright white when wet so you can see anywhere you missed.
  • Leave shoes to dry for a day.
  • Note glitter in your eye HURTS.  Make sure you wash your hands, thoroughly.
  • Finish off the glass of wine and bust out some disco moves.
Day 2:
  • Start as in day 1, wine and music.
  • Give shoes a tap to remove loose glitter.
  • Sip wine.
  • Take shoes into a well-lit room or into the sunshine to find spots you missed.
  • Re-do glue layer and re-glitter.
  • This gives good glitter coverage and requires further celebration because they are now so pretty.
  • Finish off the glass of wine and bust out disco moves.
Day 3:
  • Start as in Days 1 and 2, wine and music.
  • Stuff shoes with crunched up shopping bags to stop spray going inside shoes.
  • Give can of spray varnish a good shake.
  • Make sure nozzle is pointing at shoes and not at your face.  I add this step for you dear reader, as I did not do this check, and varnished my face.  Extra tip have turpentine close by to remove varnish from face and glasses. 
  • Have an extra glass of wine to wash away the taste of spray varnish.  It tastes very, very, bad (shudder).
  • Give shoes a good coating of varnish.  Leave to dry overnight.
  • Have another glass of wine to celebrate finishing shoes.  Dance with wild abandon.
Day 4:
  • Beautiful Dorothy shoes! So exciting. Time to party on down.  Break out the bubbly to celebrate.
Wearing Dorothy Shoes may cause you to break into random moments of Blue Steele)

(Watch out Heidi, Vogue here I come)

 (Note clever use of bright red heels to distract the eye from my colourful cankles).

(Even better black & white hides a multitude of sins)

*Big thanks to my eldest and his ability to not laugh when taking photos of his mother, and for his judicious use of photoshop.
    So there you go, dear readers.  Now you can make your own magical Dorothy shoes.  In reality, it doesn't matter if you wear them or not (although I fully intend to) they are art.  Simply having them on display to look at, is bound to bring a little magic into your day.

    The New Dorothy :)

    Happiness, Goldfrapp (2008)


    1. I love this idea! I'd probably be too much of a chicken to wear them out on a regular day, but damn it if I could be a slutted up Dorothy for Halloween.

      Not that you're slutting it up. I mean, here people are so judgy here and, uh, fuck. Foot. Mouth.

      :) No really, I LOVE the photos, the shoes, the dress, and the place you chose for background is gorgeous.

      Happy friday!

    2. Oh Michelle, love the shoes, looking forward to making my own during Summer break, though I'm considering making mine purple to go with the purple shading of my feet!

    3. Ah MAH GAHD! I have to make a pair. Or 10. One in every color.

      You do not have cankles. Just had to point that out.

    4. I'm thinking Guy Pearce just looking at those shoes!! What a look, it is toooooo sexy.

      I have conveniently ignored the fact that body doesn't really like it when I drink alcohol and have had some wine. Time for bed.

    5. Hahaha those are just AWESOME. And check you out looking like a forties pinup! Very nice.

      OK now that I sound like a lusty old man with morningwood, I'll leave that there.

      You know, this is shameful, but I can't remember the last time I wore heels. Little ones for a job interview I think it was. But real heels? LONG TIME AGO.

      Of course I've been known to wear "brothel creepers" and have a past of Doc Marten wearing badassness so maybe it's not that unusual... :)

    6. these shoes look fab, I saw Lady M's too but your version is so much better because you included wine drinking in the instructions!! I never do anything crafty without a glass of wine close by!

    7. Brilliant post and as always LMAO funny. You really should be writing a book - even if it's just a collection of your blogs and sending off to publishers. I know I can write ok when I try but I always read your blog and think "i wanna write like that!!!!" Great shoes too, I'd certainly wear them out and think you will see some very similar ones in shops soon - so your even on trend! By the way imagined your ankles to double as purple mazes with which you could use to keep your kiddies amused by handing them a wash off texta – but they look perfectly normal!!

    8. OWO - I think you could definitely rock some Dorothy Heels. The background is our back yard. Thanks to my eldest's groovy photo media skills you can't spot the dog bowl, mud or weeds. :)

      Michele - purple will look fantastic. I'm thinking you could do a new art project with your kids, maybe they could glitter up some sandles??

    9. Litlsuzzy - welcome, thanks for the cankle comment you can come back anytime :) Though I must admit I have to thank my son's airbrushing skills, a lot!

      Sunburnt Earth - they are very Guy Perce, especially wish I had his calves. <y body is no longer a fan of alcohol either but sometimes you just have to take one for the team.

    10. Veg - ah yes 40s pinup for the visually impaired. LOL You know, I kinda picked you as a lusty old man, hmmmm.

      Lizzie - a glass of wine makes any project better :)

    11. Neroli - Thanks for the compliment about the writing. Maybe I could call my book "Ravings of a Mad Woman in Stunning Red Heels". I must say when putting photos of yourself on the internet you must always have a son who is a photo media student, he can work wonders with those airbrushing tools. I think with all his diligent air brushing he is angling for a PS3. I mean, he didn't even laugh at my 'Blue Steele" impersonations.

    12. Also, for some reason your comment on my current blog entry won't let me moderate it. I mean it will but then it doesn't show up. WTF? Stupid Internetz. :( Anyway I'm just saying in case you think I'm ignoring you. AS IF! :)

    13. Oh, I was about to scold your for making fun of those cheetah printed metallic heels, but then I saw what you did with them. WOW, DOROTHY! What happens when you click the heels together? (Besides falling)

    14. I think I have to tongue kiss you now. Seriously. But before you agree to our make out session, I should probably admit I loved the shoes pre-glitter, too.

      I live in Jersey. It can't be helped.

      In an homage to Veg, I might have to glitterize a pair o' doc martens.

      Then I'll use up WAY more than a bee's dick worth of glitter. (I'm using that as a certified term of measurement now.)

    15. Loveable - I knew someone would love those heels in their natural state. I wanted to click my heels together so badly but was afraid of hurting the glitter (and breaking my neck).

      Elly Lou - that is my first offer of tongue kisses on this blog and I must say I'm mighty chuffed and a little afraid. Just cause it's you I'll let you borrow my bee's dick, but only cause it's you and am afraid of a glittery doc martin heading towards my arse.

    16. Veg - you are like the bestest blogger ever. Who else would go out of their way to let me know that they couldn't moderate my comment and hadn't just said "screw that bitch and her dumb arse comment". I feel all warm and tingly inside. :)

    17. Absolutely gorgeous! :-)

    18. Beautiful shoes, but YOU are truly gorgeous! I just have to say that it is absolutely NOT FAIR that you live with Bob and still look like that. HUMPH! I may just have to boycott your little corner of the blogosphere 'cause it just ain't right. I was looking pretty fine (if I do say so myself) before Bob came to live with me, but he royally messed me over. Bob sucks. You can keep him.

      If only.

      Actually, I wish we ALL could get rid of Bob. Kill him. Bury him somewhere he'd never be found again. That would be so awesome!

      Michelle, I {{heart}} your blog. Your posts always make me laugh and that is something I seriously need to do on a daily basis just to keep my sanity. I appreciate it and I will definitely be back! :0)

      I hope you have a wonderful day.


      Teresa <><

      ♥ Too Many Heartbeats ♥

    19. Teresa - I feel like I should do some behind the scenes expose (maybe it could go on E! just before Kendra and just after The Kardashians). It's a wonder what a great computer photo shopping program plus a son who loves photo media can do. Now I just need a little man to follow me around all day airbrushing me as I go.

      And I agree Bob needs to 'be taken care of'. Inthe spirit of this post I'm thinking a pair of cement shoes may be in order :)

    20. I made a pair of these for my daughter when she was 4 - she never went anywhere without them.
      never though to make some for myself.

      I think I just might

    21. Niqi - children shouldn't have all the fun :) Mine are sitting next to my bed and they make me smile every time I look at them. Kick up your heels with your new hair:)

    22. I think I'm going to make a pair using black glitter. How has the glitter held up over time?

    23. Alana - The glitter has held up pretty well. I've done the odd touch up, but luckily thanks to my poor ability to judge how much I'd need, I brought enough glitter for 20 pairs of shoes. A quick and light spray of varnish every now and then has also helped. I'd love to see a picture if you do make a pair. :)

    24. lol tried to make my own...
      yours so much better, it is so hard to find normal glitter on the central coast! so i had some shitty glitter, not as bright, but apart from that, love them!
      thanks heaps - Kiarne

    25. Kiarne - Even shitty glitter is good glitter. Every girl needs a pair of sparkly heels. Glad you love them.

    26. Oh Help! You had me ROFLMAO!!! I even had to show your post to the Mr. and he had a good chuckle at your humour too. Seriously though, I might just have to give it a go some time. ;)
      Thanks for a great start to my evening!

    27. Seaweed and Raine - glad I could give you a few laughs. Loved to see a pic if you do make a pair. :)

    28. Love, love, love this post :) My 2.5yr old daughter has recently become addicted to The Wizard of Oz...a movie I loved as a child as well...and what little girl's love of that movie would ever complete without a Dorothy Gale dress and some Ruby Slippers???? So, yesterday, after reading your post....we went shopping for blue gingham, ginormous white buttons, clicky heeled shoes, red paint and GLITTER....and the spray glue stuff...which I did not know existed when I made my own Dorothy shoes back in high school. With the dress complete...and her toe nails and finger nails painted red with ruby glitter....she is impatiently waiting for her now red shoes to dry so we can tackle the glitter part. Thanks again for the step by step...and the laughs!

    29. Can I use dorthy flats? instead of dorthy heels? Heels and fainting is not a good idea haha

    30. I'm a huge Wizard of Oz fan who is getting married in October..what a creative idea! I'll be making these to wear at my wedding, so much less expensive than traditional bridal shoes.

    31. Straight up, I just made these and they are the most fabulous things I've ever seen in my entire life. Your instructions worked like a dream, and I can't wait to rock these on my wedding day. Thank you!


    All who are lovely enough to comment should be showered with cup cakes, glitter and macarons. I promise to use my spoon bending mind powers to try and get that happening for all who are lovely enough to share their words. Those who go the extra step to share posts should really get a free unicorn. Or at least the gift of finding the shortest and quickest line at the supermarket on a regular basis. xx

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