To sleep, perchance to dream.

Sleep and I have not been friends for quite some time now. I have forgotten what it's like to simply fall asleep, dream sweet dreams, and wake up refreshed. These days I spend my nights staring at the ceiling and contemplating smothering the happily snoring Mr Grumpy with my pillow as he flaunts his prodigious sleeping skills. (I also fantasise about shaving off one of Mr Grumpy's eyebrows, in my bouts of crazy, sleep-depraved jealousy. You know, just to mix it up a bit). Actually, that's not completely true. In reality I have a persistent, well, persistently crap, sleep cycle  It involves roughly 3 weeks of insomnia, followed by 3-4 days coma sleep, followed by yet more weeks of insomnia,..... repeat ad infinitum.

I simply can't fall asleep. And if I eventually do, I can't stay asleep. Instead, dozing and waking repeatedly, for a few hours. I have tried meditation, sleep hygiene, herbal remedies such as valerian, zizyphus, and camomile  lavender pillows, lavender on my temples, warm baths, warm milk, swearing, begging, crying. None of it seems to work. This old post is still a good reflection of my nights except for the night time pee-fest which the amazing DDAVP has mostly eliminated.

And can I just say that the coma sleep phase is no picnic either. It's not refreshing in the slightest and leaves me just as exhausted as the insomnia, with the fantastic addition of making me even less functional than usual. I'm pretty sure Mr Grumpy is reminded how lucky he was to marry me every time he sees my elegant splayed and comatose form, drooling like a champ onto various pillows. I believe that's what's known in marriage therapy as, keeping the magic alive.

My lack of brain cells and way-to-long list of medical appointments, has meant that this aspect of Bob has been left to languish. I mean how many doctors and ailments can you deal with at one time? It's all about prioritising issues and trying to overcome medical fatigue to drag your arse to yet another appointment. But apparently, it's not that good to ignore insomnia, or so the horrified look on my neurologist's face seemed to say. Rocking up to my appointment pretty incoherent after sleeping less than 2hrs a night for over a week, seemed to alarm her a tad, so she quickly typed out a referral to a local sleep specialist assuring me that he was fantastic. And to my surprise she was right.

How often can you say you see a specialist who is both knowledgeable and friendly? And not fake friendly, genuinely friendly and personable. Even chatting happily to my eldest about Schoolies. To top things off he had recently been to a presentation by my cardiologist on the various forms of Dysautonomia, diagnosis, treatments etc. Jackpot! We discussed tilt tables, clonidine research, alternative and traditional treatments, compounding pharmacies, the works. Whether or not he can help me is almost beside the point, because it is just so refreshing to have a non-stressful medical appointment.

He was thorough and listened. We have a starter plan. I am to have at-home monitoring for a week rather than stay overnight for a sleep study, where as even he acknowledged, I'll likely just stare at the ceiling the whole time and give them little to no information. To make things easier and avoid the travel issue for me, Mr Grumpy can pick up and drop off the gear and he'll even do a phone consult after.

"Whoa!", I hear you say. "A doctor who listens, is thorough, knowledgeable, knows about Dysautonomia, is friendly and wants to make it as easy as possible for me?" Sounds like an urban myth, right? Believe me I was pinching myself just to make sure it wasn't a dream. Day-dream of course, none of that real sleep/dream stuff for me. But it's all true. it was also completely covered, so no out-of-pocket  expense (though the hospital parking which cost me a kidney and the promise of my first born, made up for that). There are some good doctors around, just finding them can be damn difficult at times.

Now as to whether he can help me, I have no clue. But I will bask in the glow of a pleasant medical experience for a change. You really have to appreciate those moments when they happen. After a really dismal and infuriating Dermatology visit a few weeks ago this was just what I needed to renew my faith in the medical system.

Tomorrow Mr Grumpy picks up my snazzy new accessory which will give him a recording of my circadian rhythms, and movements for the week. And from there we will discuss my options.

So a big high five to Professor Snooze, whatever the eventual outcome. Because we need to give a shout out to the good doctors when we find them. And here's hoping that soon I may be able to write a post where all you'll see is a very contented zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....

Cheers
Michelle :)

PS. I've been lucky enough to be nominated for Best in Show: Blog and best Humour Blog 2012! in WEGOhealth's Health Activist Awards. 

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This one's for Mr Grumpy. After talking about smothering him in his sleep I kinda owe him. Having said that I do know all the lyrics to this one thanks to it's prevalence in our dating days. Not quite as chipper as my other choice Mr Sandman.

Highlights.

This has been a week of highlights in Rustyville.    Here are but a few.


Have used Charlie Sheen as my new barometer of crazy, and have decided that on the newly devised Charlie Sheen Insanity Scale (CSIS) I am completely sane.

• Not to self:  using a man who states that he is not bipolar but "bi-winning" to gauge my own sanity may in and of itself suggest that I am well on my way to Loonyville.

Sang badly and loudly to Evanescence in the car. 

• Note to self: don't listen to dramatic emo music whilst already in the "I'm the worlds worst mum" state of mind.  The sight of my sobbing, snot-smeared face, belting out misheard lyrics may qualify as road hazard to other drivers.

Started, yet again (100th times the charm), to write a book (stop laughing Mr Grumpy).  First paragraph alluded to cousin loving in my pre-electricity familial tree, and a parental "lie back and think of England" sexual attitude, as potential causes for my ill health.   I'm sure my parents will be proud.

• Note to self : check if it's possible to add banjo music to a book?

Have repeatedly used the phrase "but um" in conversation when words and conscious thought have failed me.  Children think this hilarious, thanks to an episode of  How I met your mother, where one of the characters said "but um" so often on her TV show, it was turned into a drinking game by college students.
For example:
Me:  "Eldest Monkey Boy!!!" (screeched out loud enough for my deaf and confused elderly neighbour to hear).
EMB: "Yes mommy dearest" (must stop threatening children about using wire coat hangers).
Me: "I need you to.............but um".
EMB: "But um!" (snigger)
Me: "Stop that!  Now, but um.....  Damn it!"
EMB:  "But um!" (more sniggering)
Me: "That's not funny.  Now, but um..... Damn it!"
EMB: (rolls on floor, holding sides whilst laughing and shouting) "BUT UM, BUT UM, BUT UM".
Me:  "Fine.  You are now grounded forever.  Right. (deep breath) Now, but um......Arghhhhhhhhh", (storm off dramatically).

• Not to self:  purchase a DeLorean and flux capacitor, to enable current self to go back in time and slap younger self for thinking having children would be a wonderful idea.

Have only just remembered I have a Twitter account.  Am amazed that people have decided to follow me even though my last conscious tweet was on the 9th of January.  Thankfully, I had linked up my FB page to automatically tweet my frequent witticisms, so it looks like I am a social media savvy tweeter.  Rather than a sad old woman who keeps forgetting that she has a Twitter account.  Though I am just a little concerned that Twitter keeps suggesting I follow Justin Beiber and Kanye West and some strange woman who wants to show me her breasts.  Explain yourself Twitter.

• Not to self: must discover what else am I forgetting. Lets see.  Wearing underwear?  Check.  Used BO basher? Check.  Fed spawn of Satan/children? Must have, can't hear whinging. Check.

Have attempted to answer the multitude of emails, messages and comments that have been building up, thanks to the "Vacant" sign that has taken up residence inside my head.  I'm really not trying to be a rude cow by answering in such a tardy manner.  Just when you are down to one brain cell, who refuses to work overtime and insists on taking every last second of her allotted coffee breaks, it can be a slow process. Especially if you want a coherent response.  However, if a response composed completely of neologisms is okay, let me know and I'll send one off immediately. I'm sure at my current speedy pace of one response a day I will get there. 

• Note to self: must get around to hiring Eunice a PA.  Hot, shirtless, cabana boys are encouraged to apply.

Have alternated between staring at the ceiling for hours on end without the pleasant distraction of considering how I can get away with smothering Mr Grumpy in his blissful sleep (he was away for work), and coma sleep.  As usual the universe has delighted in making fun of my sleep challenged life by sending this link my way.  And yes it is in Finish, or Finishian, or whatever the correct term is.  Yes universe send me a link to artsy pictures of  Finlandites (it's my blog and I will make up words if I want) blissfully asleep, bastard.

• Note to self: must stop thinking that the universe is so obsessed with me that it would go out of it's way to mock me on a regular basis or I will end up at the 'bat shit crazy' end of the CSIS.   

 

• Extra Note to self:  stop watching any TV show, radio broadcast, newspaper column, blog, or internet site that makes reference to Charlie Sheen in any way.  Must make life a Charlie Sheen Free-Zone. Though I am kinda interested in how he cured himself with his "brain".  Maybe I should send Eunice round to his place for a few pointers.  On second thought, he's liable to make Eunice his next 'goddess' and I couldn't put the old gal through that.

So dear readers, what delights have been the highlights of your week?  I hope you too are livin la vida loca*.

Bring on the margaritas.
Michelle :)

* Should I add that my eldest loved Ricky Martin when he was little and knew all the words and dance steps to his early albums? I'm sure he wont  mind me sharing.  He also had a thing for Shania Twain's I feel Like A Woman, but that's really something I should probably keep for his 21st.

A small musical interlude in remembrance of my pre-children, pre-husband, pre-sick golden days. I give you Blister in the Sun by the Violent Femmes (1982).  Plus this particular film clip has John Cusack in Grosse Pointe Blank, and includes a cat puppet.  What more could you want?

Mr Sandman Bring Me A Dream: Insomnia (Part II): Sleep Hygiene

Oh how I hated the hygiene seminars at work (Infection Control being the fancy schmancy name they gave it in the hospital).  Every year I sat through the same mind numbing Power Point presentation.  Rubbed the same goop on my hands.  Washed them.  Had the magical blue light waved over my hands.  And, shock horror, still had goop stuck in the cracks in my dry old lady corpse hands.   Mind you it was a lot less goop than the first timers who looked like they had simply waved their hands in the vicinity of the bathroom.  We IC veterans would sit back all cocky and laugh, "Ha Ha", at their poor hand washing skills (yes, yes, we had it all over Scrubs with our hospital humour).  The IC nurse would tutt tutt at us all, then give us a mini chocolate bar and send us on our way.

Pink Avaguard bottles decorated the wards.  Essentially paint stripper, we bathed our hands in it pre and post-patient.  No wonder we had cracked hands, the damn stuff sucked the moisture from your skin until you were left with nothing but desiccated stumps where your fingers used to be.  Scrub, glove and gown, disposable this and disposable that.

Mind you despite the IC crusades, our hospital still managed to have one of the worst gastro outbreaks in the states history.  The air was filled with a miasma of hospital grade bleach and foetid bodily excretions, that couldn't quite be covered by the nuclear powered air freshener that was pumped out almost continually for the length of the outbreak.  Staff fell one by one to the foul khaki beast.  No patients were admitted for three weeks.  The wards soon resembled a ghost town.  It was brilliant. I got paid to see no patients and pretty much drink coffee and catch up on my reading (see even back in the day I was silver lining girl).  Moral of the story though: Hygiene is important people, or the whole world (or a small Australian public hospital) literally goes to shit.

(This does not constitute good hygiene practices)

Similarly hygiene is important with regard to sleep.  Are you a dirty sleeper?  Do you fail to clean in all the right sleepy places?  Is soap anathema in your life?  Then you need Sleep Hygiene. 

All sleep programs start with learning and implementing Sleep Hygiene practices.  It's like starting Bob treatments with increased salt and water.  It's not necessarily a cure all, but it will give you the best fighting chance to start fixing sleep issues.  And lets face it anything that doesn't involve taking yet another pill is always a good thing.  Basically Sleep Hygiene involves changing and managing the behaviours that revolve around sleep.  So break out that big bottle of behaviour bleach and get scrubbing, there's some learning to be had.

• It Begins at the Beginning: It starts when you get up.  Shocking I know. Who'd of thunk that sleep hygiene starts first thing in the morning.  Our bodies like routine.  When you break that routine it can takes days or even weeks to get back into the normal swing of things.  It's why shift work can be so detrimental to sleep.  Essentially you need to get up and go to bed at the same time each day, day after day.  This sets your body into a routine where 9pm roles around and it already knows it's wind down time.

• Good Morning Sunshine: As soon as you get up go to your window and pull open the curtains or step outside into the sunshine/light.   Light is powerful.  One of the treatments for Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is light therapy, in the form of a light box. The increased light triggers off chemicals in the brain and body which say "hey buddy wake up, NOW". Personally I think this gives you a good excuse to sit outside and have a cup of coffee and tune out the world, kids, husbands, dogs etc for 10 mins.   A little sunshine, a cup of coffee and some me time can simply lift my mood.

• Frankie Says Relax: Relaxation techniques are great to get your body in the mood.  Now I'm not talking nookie mood, though a little exercise can help you sleep, I'm talking sleep mood.  Learning some simple techniques such as Focused Breathing or Progressive Muscle Relaxation can work wonders to get your body in the right state to fall asleep.  Yoga and meditation are also good techniques to help you relax.  Mind you I do my yoga whilst listening to AC/DC so I don't know if that really counts but I find it quite soothing (What? You don't find Big Balls relaxing? What about rather humorous? Okay just me then).

• Gone in 30 Seconds (Make That 20 Minutes): if after lying in bed for 20 mins you are still wide awake it's time to get up.  Go into another room, sit quietly, put on a soft light and read a book or listen to some airy whale song music.  Don't go in the lounge and turn on your favourite Death Metal tunes or play Death Kill Destroy Bloodbath III on your X-box.  The idea is to change your scenery, breathe, relax, and then try again.  

• Your Bed is not the Location for a Small Imaginary Agricultural Enterprise:  Bed's should be used for one of two things.  Sleep or Sex.  Unfortunately most us, myself included, use the old tempurpedic as a laundry, home office, pet bed, library and general store all.  Personally I blame my lap top.  It's a foul temptress, drawing me to use it in bed with it's seductive mobility and perfect lap fittedness (okay so I don't know if that last one is a word, but it's my blog damn it, and I'll make up words and you can't do anything about it, so niki niki na na).  The problem with this is that your bed is no longer associated with blissful sleep or earth shattering, hanging from the chandelier sex that leaves you so blissfully exhausted you can't help but fall asleep.  You need to make you bed and bedroom into a blissful sleep haven, not be tending your imaginary corn field or taking a quiz to work out which Smallville character you are most like.

• Siestas are the invention of Al Qeida:  If you sleep or nap during the day you might as well resign yourself to partying on down with 3am.  A short powernap for 20 mins can be great if you are struggling, but once you go over that you start to put your body clock out of whack again.  This is a hard one, especially when you have fatigue issues.  Sometimes despite my best efforts my body wins the fight and I simply nod off only to wake up two hours later with a sexy line of drool joining the corner of my mouth and my t-shirt.  I know then that the night ahead will not be filled with sweet dreams. 

• Lets Get Physical: Exercise helps you sleep, but not if you are doing it at 10pm.  We should all exercise on a regular basis but no exercise within four hours of when you intend to go to sleep.  Mornings (HA! yeah right I can barely coordinate my body enough to brush my hair in the mornings) or afternoons are fine and shouldn't interfere with sleep.  So try your best to get a little exercise each day.

• Rituals Aren't Just for The Obsessive Compulsive:  Rituals gets a bad rap.  But they aren't all satanic kitten sacrifices or checking your locks 1,000 times to prevent the destruction of the world, sometimes they are good things.  Part of the whole sleep hygiene process is teaching your body to identify sleep cues by developing a sleep ritual that you can do every night to get your body in the mood.  Have a warm bath, put on some soothing music, lower the lights, put some soothing oils in your oil burner, read a book, meditate, what ever takes your fancy.  Doing this every night, your body learns to recognise the signs for bed time. Think Pavlovs dogs, you're ringing the bell to make yourself salivate for sleep.

• Margaritas Do Not Equal Sleep:  Caffeine, nicotine and alcohol are all bad for sleep and shouldn't be consumed within 4-6 hours of going to bed.  It's disappointing I know.  How can margaritas ever be anything but good.  They taste so yummy, come in flavours like strawberry or kiwi, presented in a cute salt rimmed glass, sometimes with an umbrella; it just feels wrong to say anything bad about them.   But the truth is if you partake of a few margaritas, beers, wine or any form of alcohol you're sleep pattern is going to take a hit.  You may initially go to sleep/pass out but your sleep will be fragmented.  Add to that some caffeine or nicotine and you might as well get used to sitting up all night watching infommercials and purchasing more ShamWows than you could ever use in six lifetimes.

• Milk Moustaches Are Sexy:  if you have an empty stomach when you go to bed you'll wake up.  A little snack like a glass of milk will help you feel fuller, and contains the magical ingredient tryptophan, which is known to help you sleep.  Other tryptophan filled foods are turkey and lettuce.  So you could have a glass of milk and a turkey and lettuce sandwich, yummo.  

 

• Feeling Hot Hot Hot:  temperature is also important in getting a good nights sleep.  Having a warm bath is relaxing but the drop in temperature when you get out is the actual signal for your body to get sleepy.  Dropping the temperature in your bedroom can help with dropping off to sleep.  It's hard to pick a good temperature as everyone is slightly different as to what is comfortable (eg my internal thermostat is set at Sahara Desert, so cool to me is about 4C).  In general 18 to 22C (65-72F) is about the right range for optimal sleep.  

 

• Pimp My Bedroom: bedroom design is important.  Cluttered rooms make for poor sleeping environments.  Now whilst we can't all afford (or be bothered) to have a bedroom that looks like something from some boutique hotel and spa retreat, we can do some things to make the environment a bit more conducive to sleep.  Darkness is key.  Invest in some blackout curtains or a sexy sleeping mask.  Quiet is also a prerequisite.  If you live in a noisy area use some ear plugs or use a white noise machine.  If all else fails you can always invest in one of these.

Now, I'm not saying these tips will work for everyone (and I've probably missed a few vitally important ones).  Or that they are easy to implement in our busy days.  And just like Pantene, it wont happen over night, but it will happen.   Sometimes it can take as long as 6wks to get your body into the groove.  But it's a great starting point.  It's free.  And, if like me you are already the human maraca, it's a pill free option and that's always good.  Even if you require medication or take herbal remedies to sleep you should still add these tips into your sleep routine. 

Here's wishing all my nocturnal readers a good nights sleep.

(Image from here)

Cheers
The Sort Of Sleeping Beauty Michelle :)

Whilst I find whale songs and new age music in general like nails on a chalk board, I do have a late night music selection which I crank out to relax.  One of my favs is by Australian band George, featuring the incredible vocals of Katie Noonan, Breathe in Now (2002).

From LYRICSMODE.COM lyrics archive

Mr Sandman Bring Me A Dream: Insomnia (Part I)

Average night in the Rusty Household: 

9:00pm 
Feel exhausted go to bed. Close eyes and think happy thoughts (ie, spin hot guy wheel.  What will it be tonight? Shirtless Johnny Depp, shirtless Christian Bale (Batman Begins only), shirtless Jensen Ackles, shirtless Viggo Mortensen (Aragorn version only, he really needs to be grotty and dirty or it's a no go), shirtless Dave Grohl (don't ask me why, but the man has that weird musician hot thing going on, besides have you heard the acoustic version of Everlong? mmmmm), shirtless....well you get the picture).

9:30pm
Still wide awake.  Spin hot guy wheel again, "why yes Batman I would like a back rub".

10:00pm
Still wide awake.  Realise I need to go to loo.  Try to ignore need to go to loo.  Know that now I realise I need to go to the loo I will never go to sleep until I go to the loo.  Swear.  Get up and go to the loo.

10:30pm
Fall asleep. 

10:40pm
Wake up.  Toss up whether to look at clock.  Know I will be disappointed if I look at the clock so decide not to look at clock. Close eyes determined not to look at clock.  Not looking.  Not Looking.  Not Looking.

10:45pm
Need to look at clock overwhelming.  Look at clock.  Swear.  Turn away from clock.  Close eyes.  Try to relax and find hot guy wheel once more.  Fail and lie there fuming.

11:30pm
Still wide awake.  Go to loo yet again.  Launch myself at bed in attempt to wake up Mr Grumpy so he can suffer with me.  Fail.  He continues to snore.  Bastard rubbing his premier sleeping ability in my face.  Contemplate smothering him with my pillow.

Midnight
Still awake.  Listen to possums making sweet, sweet, love on my corrugated iron roof.  For those of you outside of Australia, it is not pleasant to listen to rooting possums on your tin roof.  There is screeching and thumping, punctuated with hissing and weird clucking sounds.  It is LOUD.

12.45am
Still awake.  Go to loo yet again.  Listen to possums continuing to get freaky on roof.  Laugh as one falls off roof, THUMP!  Silence.  Take that nymphomaniac possums.  Rustle, rustle. Damn they are like cockroaches even a two-story fall wont kill them.

1:00am
Finally drift off.

1:30am 
Wake up again.  Look at clock.  Contemplate throwing alarm clock across room (or at loud rooting possums, or blissfully snoring husband), but apathy wins out.  Go to loo again.  Go back to bed and try to work out the big issues.  Is Beaker or Animal my favourite Muppet?  If Miss Piggy and Kermit had kids would they be Progs or Figs? Is Wile E. Coyote really that dumb, or does he suffer from severe amnesia resulting from repeated roadrunner-induced, coup and counter-coup brain injuries?

2:00am
Still awake.  Go to loo yet again.  Put a hex on my accursed acorn-sized bladder of stupidity.  Unable to even locate hot guy wheel in my head.  Lie there staring at the ceiling.  Begin to have thoughts of tasaring Jeff from The Wiggles.  You'd wake up then Jeff, you smug, purple-skivvied sleeper!

2:30am
Still awake.  Get up go out to kitchen and get a glass of water.  If I have to pee myself stupid(er) I might as well pee out water rather than precious bodily fluids.  Stare out at stars and curse Time itself.  Drag self back to bed.  Accidentally (wink wink nod nod) slam bedroom door.  Let loose a stream of profanity as Mr Grumpy continues to sleep peacefully.  Sadistic bastard continues to rub his sleeping abilities in my face.

3:00am
Fall asleep.

5:00am
Wake up.  OMG!  Two hours sleep in a row.  Woo Hoo.  Loo yet again.  Pee like a horse.  Where the hell does all this liquid come from?  Is someone forcing water down my throat with a funnel whilst I am zoned out in some sleep-deprived dissociative state?

5:05am
Pray I fall asleep again before kids get up at 7am (or worse Volleyball practice mornings with a 6am start, damn them and their desire to do before and after school activities.  Why can't they be like normal kids and waste their life in front of the TV or Computer screen)

7-7:30am
Drag pathetic exhausted body from bed.  Scull strong coffee from bucket-sized mug.  Throw tablets at face.  Hope some get in mouth.  Fail to notice tablet stuck in left nostril.  Pee like horse yet again.

8:00am
Throw on jumper over pajamas, find keys and drive kids to bus stop (though the other morning I started driving them down the hill in the opposite direction, luckily it clicked and I was able to turn around and get them to the bus stop on time and no one was any the wiser).  Start day in normal exhausted state.

Repeat night ad nauseum.

*

Ugh! I hate, no I loathe insomnia.  I've never been a good sleeper but since Bob came into the picture it has become much, much worse.  Now there are times where I sleep.  In fact I sleep like the dead, but this is usually after weeks of no or little sleep and lasts only a day or two.  Basically, it's either coma or wide awake and absolutely nothing in between.

I wouldn't care so much if I could do something when I was wide awake at 3am.  But noooo, that aint happening.  I am even more moronic during those hours.  I tried writing once.  But when I got up in the morning it was a complete jumble of misspelt gobbledegoop, that looked like it had been written by a meth-addled, sight-impaired tapir.

Ask anyone with Bob and they'll tell you the same story.  Insomnia is just part of the package.  What I wouldn't do for a good nights sleep.  (Well I wouldn't do that, you sicko.  Get your mind out of the gutter).  I know back from my PB (Pre-Bob) days that poor sleep screws with your immune system, increases your chances of heart disease, makes you gain weight and does all sorts of nasty things to your body.  Watch The Machinist, bad things can happen with insomnia (hence my Christian Bale fantasy involves his Batman days, not this ickiness).

I can find a silver lining for most symptoms

eg, Nausea = Eat Less = Lose Weight = Fit in old Jeans = YAY,

but not insomnia.  Can't fall asleep, can't stay asleep, can't function when awake = crap! 

I used to teach patients Sleep Hygiene, so this is yet another bitch slap from the Irony Fairy, she is such a cow.

Who knew that narcoleptic cheese-grater man would become my hero.  How I envy that rotund, naked bastard.  Well technically he wasn't naked.  He wore a hospital gown, but combine his enormous girth with his tendency to pull the gown up to his hips to "air" his bits, well he was pretty much naked where it counts (shudder).  Before you get worried, it was not even remotely sexual, especially not for me and not even for him (the man itched with a cheese grater he wasn't exactly familiar with the real world).  It took me a week to complete an interview with this man thanks to the frequency of his narcoleptic attacks.  What I wouldn't give for a week of that (minus the cheese-grater though).

I have tried using Sleep Hygiene techniques and that does help a bit.  I take some herbal tabs with Zizyphus which seem to get me to about 3hrs in a row, which makes life a little more bearable.  But not much is working.  I am tossing up about a sleep study or some sleeping tabs (not that I want another prescription) but thanks to the mechanisms of Bob their isn't a huge amount to do until you get your Autonomic Nervous System sorted out.  And well, that's really going to plan, Right?

 

(I think Counting Sheep doesn't work for me because I count killer Zombie Sheep)

So there is my woe is me wingefest about my lack of sleep.  I know it's not just my fellow Bobettes who deal with this, so I send a big "I feel you" to all my readers who spend their nights contemplating Muppet offspring and desiring to zap beloved children's performers, rather than enjoying the insides of their eyelids.  Insomnia sucks my friends.  It sucks.

In Part II, I'll actually do some helpful sleep tips which are the basis of Sleep Hygiene.   See I can be helpful sometimes.

Cheers
The Nocturnal Michelle :)